From: buffyfic-owner@xmission.com (buffyfic Digest) To: buffyfic-digest@xmission.com Subject: buffyfic Digest V1 #14 Reply-To: buffyfic@xmission.com Sender: buffyfic-owner@xmission.com Errors-To: buffyfic-owner@xmission.com Precedence: buffyfic Digest Tuesday, August 19 1997 Volume 01 : Number 014 In this issue: BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (4/10) BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (3/10) BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (2/10) BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (5/10) BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (7/10) See the end of the digest for information on subscribing to the buffyfic or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Tue, 19 Aug 1997 22:54:24 -0400 (EDT) From: LadyRHood@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (4/10) DISCLAIMER:I don't own any of the characters from the buffyverse. Sometimes I steal them like I am doing now but I always return them as good as new. And I never make any money off them. (That would make me a pimp if I did wouldn't it?) They belong to the nice people at Fox, the WB and of course to Joss Wheadon. Also thanks to my fabulous beta reader: Dare the Great :) Part 4 ############ Buffy stood in front of her mirror staring at herself. She smoothed the light blue dress she had finally decided on and pulled on her boots. She moved closer to the mirror and checked her make-up. Her body turned back and forth in front of the mirror, the dress swaying slightly against her legs. Finally she tore herself away from the almost hypnotizing image in the mirror. She grabbed the jacket he had given her, slipped two stakes into her wrist sheaths and put on her cross. She tucked the cross into her dress, locked her door in case her mom came looking for her and slipped out the window. The night air lightly kissed her face as the moon shone like a beacon. The world was unreal, empty. For a moment Buffy felt utterly alone. But only for a moment. She jumped down from the roof and walked along the sidewalk. She was meeting Angel in the park that sat quietly about a block from her house. The park was peaceful, deserted; there was no sign of Angel yet, so Buffy sat on one of the benches drinking in the velvet darkness of night. The branches whispered softly above her head and through the dark stode a figure who could only be Angel. Everytime she saw him it sent a thrill through her heart and a shiver up her spine. He was so gorgeous, so smart, she could barely believe that he could love someone like her. Someone who was so immature compared with him. Someone so inexperienced. She rose from her seat and walked to meet him. As soon as she was within reach he grabbed her around the waist and drew her to him. She traced the line of his cheekbone as he pulled her in for a kiss. Everytime their lips met, it was like an electric shock. Everytime their eyes met, the world disappeared. Buffy sighed a little and put her arms around his powerful chest. He held her close, as if he was afraid she would be ripped from his arms. She relaxed against his chest, resting her head over his heart. Safety, comfort, love; inside the circle of his arms she had it all. He bowed his head, lightly kissing her hair. Her love warmed him, and he would've given anything to keep her safe; to protect her from the threats the vampires had brought him, the threats that he had to tell her about. If only time would stop, if only they could spend eternity wrapped in each others arms. Buffy stared up at Angel's face, her eyes glittering with unshed tears and was surprised to see a single tear roll down his cheek. She caught the tear on her finger, entranced for a moment by the bead of salty blood tinged water. Then she absently shook it away. "What's wrong?" she asked. Angel looked down at her innocent eyes. She had seen so much horror, yet she retained an innocence that he wanted to protect. An innocence that he knew would dissappear slowly, a little piece vanishing with each terror she faced. "Let's sit down for a second." he said. The pair walked back to the bench that Buffy had vacated. Buffy sat, holding Angel's hand in hers and rested her head on his shoulder. "Last night I had a little visit." Angel started. "What kind of visit?" asked Buffy. "The blood-sucking kind." "So you met up with some of the fang gang. What else is new?" "You don't understand." Angel said, shaking his head. "This is different. They came into my apartment and they gave me a warning." "What do you mean?" Bufffy asked turning to look at Angel's face as he finished the story. "I mean, the Annointed One sent a couple of baddies to tell me that I have to deliver your dead body to him in three days." "Or what?" "Or they'll hunt me down and kill me." "We can handle it. We've fought together before." "And we barely survived," interrupted Angel. "That was three vamps, we're talking about every vampire in the city hunting me until I am dead. It's a totally different story. And there's something else, one of the vampires who brought the message, she was incredibly powerful. I'm talking about power that could rival the Master's." "Yeah well, I killed the Master remember. I can take care of her too." Angel would've chuckled at her bravado if he wasn't so worried. "You don't understand what I'm saying yet. She's as strong as the Master was and yet she serves the Annointed One. Don't you see what that means? He must be incredibly powerful." "He's just a kid though." Angel shook his head at Buffy's comment. "No, he looks like a kid. But he's not, he is pure evil. Powerful evil." "Ok I get your point," Buffy agreed. "Come on." She stood up and pulled on Angel's hand. " Where are we going?" he asked. "We need some advice and I know the expert on advice." ********** The insistent knocking on his front door woke Giles from his couch where he lay, glasses askew, an ancient tome knocked carelessly to the floor. "I'm bloody coming already!" he yelled as he staggered to the door. He peered out the peephole and cursed under his breath when he saw Buffy with Angel. He opened the door and Buffy breezed past him with Angel in tow. "Buffy, do you have any idea what time it is?" "Way past your bedtime Giles, I know." Buffy said. "But you're going to have to give up your sleepy-time. This is WAY more important." "Is the Hellmouth reopening?" asked Giles, as panic chased the last edges of slumber away. "Sit down GIles," Buffy ordered. Obediently Giles sat down on the couch. "Tell Giles what you told me," said Buffy to Angel. GIles turned his attention to Angel as the vampire began his story again. "Last night two vampires came to my apartment with a warning from the Annointed One. They said I have three days to deliver Buffy's dead body to him or else all the vampire's in the city will hunt me down and kill me." Giles opened his mouth to interrupt but silenced himself at a glance from Angel. "One of the vampires is as powerful as the Master was but serves Colin." "Good God!" Giles exclaimed. "That boy must have immense power." "He's not a boy," interjected Buffy. GIles stared at her. "Well he's not. He's pure evil." Angel smiled silently to himself. "Right Buffy," said Giles. "You mustn't lose sight of that. It may be hard for you to kill s..something that looks like a little boy. But he's a monster like all the other vampires." Giles glanced over at Angel. "Pr..present company excepted of course." Angel just nodded in response. "Giles, focus!" said Buffy. "What can we do about this?" "First we find out more about this powerful vampire. We need to find out who he is." answered Giles. "She," corrected Angel. "I beg your pardon?" asked Giles. "It was a woman, kind of short. Close cropped hair, pretty face." Buffy turned at his description, jealous in spite of herself. "You thought she was pretty?" she asked. Giles rolled his eyes and left the room to collect the Watcher diaries. "Buffy, she had a pretty face. You on the other hand are beautiful." Angel grimaced, trying to explain himself and diffuse the situation while Buffy glared. "When I close my eyes I picture the most beautiful thing in the world and it's your face. You have nothing to be jealous about." A wide grin settled onto Buffy's face and she leapt into Angel's arms, showering him with tiny kisses. "You are impossible," she said as her lips met his. GIles re-entered the room, softly clearing his throat. "In case you've forgotten, we do actually have a serious problem here," he said impatiently. "Right, big problem" said Buffy as she reluctantly pulled away. "Very important." Giles pulled out several large leather-bound book and handed one to Buffy. Then he gave Angel a stack of five large books. "Look for any descriptions that fit the woman you saw. Pictures are even better." Giles commanded the vampire. The group slowly worked their way through book after book until finally Giles found one of the older Watcher diaries. As he read, an awful suspicion entered his mind. "Is this her?" he asked, showing Angel an old portrait. A growl built up in Angel's throat when he recognized the woman from his apartment. "That's her." "Let me see." Buffy commanded. Angel handed her the book and she peered at the picture. "She's not so pretty." Angel laughed and kissed her hand gently. "That isn't really important right now," said Giles. "Did you look at what it says about her?" "No, what's so special about her?" asked Buffy. "She was a Slayer," answered Giles. Buffy felt a chill run down her spine and she shivered in her seat. "That explains the power." "But how, how did she become a vampire?" asked Buffy. "It says that she fought the Master at that time. It was a different Master, one of the most powerful vampires in history. She had no chance. He decided to make her a vampire as a joke. But his blood, combined with her powers as the Slayer created something beyond his wildest dreams. She killed him and became the new Master. Then the record stops." "but if she's this powerful, why would she obey the Annointed One?" asked Angel. "The only thing I can think of is that he has something she wants. Or he has offered her something. If this book is correct. She could kill him easily." The trio stared at the picture. The portrait had been done before she became a vampire. She was smiling, eyes twinkiling with swallowed laughter. It was a picture of a young woman filled with life. It was a beautiful portrait, but looking at the smiling woman struck dread into each of their hearts. continues ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 19 Aug 1997 22:54:36 -0400 (EDT) From: LadyRHood@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (3/10) DISCLAIMER:I don't own any of the characters from the buffyverse. Sometimes I steal them like I am doing now but I always return them as good as new. And I never make any money off them. (That would make me a pimp if I did wouldn't it?) They belong to the nice people at Fox, the WB and of course to Joss Wheadon. Also thanks to my fabulous beta reader: Dare the Great :) ############# Part 3 Buffy woke up to the blaring of her alarm. She groaned and hit the snooze button. When the alarm rang again five minutes later, she sat up in her bed. She had fallen asleep fully dressed. She struggled to remember last nights events as she stared at her wildly knotted hair in the mirror. It came back to her in a rush. Angel, the beautiful little lake, and a huge fight with her mom. She decided she would rather not have remembered the last part. She dragged herself through the motions of getting ready for school and rode silently with her mom towards another exciting day at Sunnydale High. She was almost late for her first class so she didn't get to see Willow and Xander until they met in the library for their free third period. "Hi Buffy," Willow chirped as Buffy entered the dark confines of the library. She motioned for Buffy to sit down next to her and began pumping her for details. "So? How was your date with Angel?" Buffy glanced round the library, but didn't see the menfolk anywhere. She sighed happily remembering the feel of his arms around her. "It was so wonderful. He took me to his secret place and we sat and talked..and kissed. He told me that he loves me." "It's so romantic," Willow sighed. "Yeah, well it gets less romantic." Buffy said bitterly. "When I got home my mom had seen us kissing out on the porch and she totally wigged out. She thinks Angel's too old for me. So now I'm grounded." "Parents just don't understand." said Willow. 'You know what my mom really won't understand is if she finds out what he is." "How would she find out?" "She won't if I can help it. But for now I have to sneak out to see Angel." "What's this about sneaking?" Xander asked as he walked out of the stacks. "I can sneak." "Nothing much," said Buffy. "I'm just going to have to sneak out to meet Angel tonight, that's all...it's a whole being grounded thing." "You're seeing Angel again tonight?!" Xander demanded. "Yeah, so?" "It's nothing." Xander said. Then he corrected himself. "I mean just how close are you going to get to this guy?! Because soul or not, he's still a vampire." "I know that Xander," Buffy said angrily. "Hey, I'm just looking out for you," replied Xander. But everyone in the room knew that wasn't the whole truth. It was more jealousy than anything. Buffy glared at Xander and he hated himself a little for doing this but he couldn't stop. "Are you going to sleep with him?" he asked. "Xander!" Willow exclaimed. "That is SO none of your business," Buffy retorted angrily. "Well, have you thought about it? He's an older man, that's what older men want. You already kissed a corpse. Would you have sex with one too?" "SHUT UP, just shut up," Buffy yelled. "You don't know him. He's not like that at all." She picked up a book and threw it at Xander with all her strength. It flew just wide of his face. "You're supposed to be my friend," she hissed. "God Xander, what's wrong with you?" asked Willow angrily. "I'm sorry that I don't feel for you the way you feel for me," Buffy continued. "But don't take your jealousy out on me or Angel. If you can't handle it then you aren't really my friend and I don't want you around," she screamed. Xander took a step towards Buffy, who was shaking with anger. He reached out a hand to touch her but she pulled away. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "I didn't mean it. I'm sorry," he whispered as he walked out of the library. Willow stood shocked, unable to believe that her two best friends had practically torn each other's heads off right in front of her. She walked over to Buffy and hugged her tightly as Buffy cried. At that moment Giles walked in. "Wh..What's wrong with Xander?" he asked. He stared for a moment at Buffy sobbing in Willow's arms. "I take it there was a fight?" "You could say that," answered Willow, "if you were really into understatement." Giles reached behind his desk and pulled out a box of tissues. "I'm going to make some coffee," he said. "Does anyone want a cup?" Buffy shook her head while blowing her nose, and Willow didn't drink coffee. WIllow led Buffy over to chair and gave her a fresh Kleenex. "I'm sorry Will, I usually don't fall apart like this." "You haven't been getting enough sleep lately and Xander was being a total jerk. He's usully not like that," Willow answered. "I know, I have to meet with Angel at night but I don't get to sleep during the day." She smiled weakly. "Just another benefit of dating a local vampire boy." She touched Willow's hand gently and looked into her friend's eyes. "Am I doing the right thing Willow? Everyone else seems to think I'm crazy for doing this." Willow squeezed Buffy's hand gently and smiled encouragingly. "If Xander loved me, then nothing could keep me way from him. If he was a vampire I would still love him." Willow said. Buffy almost sighed with relief. At least one person understood how she felt. But poor Willow, it must be so hard for her to carry that secret. "Willow, I think you should tell Xander how you feel." Buffy was beginning to shake off her sadness in her eagerness to help her friend. Willow shook her head firmly, negatively. "After all this? Not a good idea. You think I want to screw up our friendships even more." "One day?" Buffy asked. "Maybe," answered Willow doubtfully. Buffy shook her head,grabbed Willow's hand and squeezed it encouragingly. Buffy knew that Willow was in pain too. She thanked her lucky stars that she and Angel were together. No matter how hard being together was, she knew that unrequited love would be worse. She couldn't imagine trying to live without Angel. They had tried to stay apart, but love was too strong. It drew them together, and neither of them could resist because being together felt so right. Soul mates, Buffy and Angel. Buffy sighed, she knew they were meant for each other. Poor Willow. "Willow?" Buffy asked. "Have you ever thought that maybe you aren't meant for Xander? That maybe he's not the guy for you. Because there _are_ other guys out there." Willow shook her head slowly. "It doesn't matter if Xander doesn't feel the same way I do. I'll love him until the end of time. If Angel wasn't in love with you would you just give up on him?" "Touche" Buffy conceded. "Come on, we have to go to class. I don't think I can handle getting detention today." The girls walked toward class, talking of boys. "Do they ever talk of anything else?" GIles wondered to himself as he watched them go. continues ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 19 Aug 1997 22:54:35 -0400 (EDT) From: LadyRHood@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (2/10) DISCLAIMER:I don't own any of the characters from the buffyverse. Sometimes I steal them like I am doing now but I always return them as good as new. And I never make any money off them. (That would make me a pimp if I did wouldn't it?) They belong to the nice people at Fox, the WB and of course to Joss Wheadon. Also thanks to my fabulous beta reader: Dare the Great :) ########### Part 2 The moon began its descent into day and Angel walked Buffy home. They kissed under the light of the moon, their lips passionately declaring devotion. They promised to meet the next night and Buffy slipped inside. As she headed for the stairs she found her path blocked by the bathrobe clad form of her mother. Her mother's face was a study of displeasure. Her mouth pulled down in to a scowl, and her arms crossed angrily in front of her. "Where have you been?" her mother asked. "I was out," answered Buffy tiredly, in no mood for a fight. "I have been worried sick. You have a curfew you know." "Well I'm sorry. I don't have a watch. I lost track of time. It won't happen again." Buffy turned to climb up the stairs, but stopped when her mother's angry tirade began. "Don't you DARE go upstairs, Buffy Summers. I am NOT through with you yet. You will turn and face me when I talk to you and you will show a little respect. I am sick and tired of dealing with your teenage angst. You are going to shape up or pay the price. And you are going to stop sneaking around behind my back." Buffy opened her mouth to protest but her mother cut her off. "I saw you with that boy, the one you said goes to the college. Angel. I saw you kiss him on the doorstep. What is wrong with you? He is WAY too old for you." Buffy briefly considered telling her mother exactly how much older Angel was but decided against that kamikazi plan. "I am old enough to take care of myself, Mother. I will date whoever I want. Besides you don't even know Angel. He's a very sweet, kind person." "You are not old enough to take care of yourself. As long as you live under my roof, you'll do as I say. And I forbid you to date that boy." The pair's voices were getting louder and louder as tempers flared. "You can't stop me." screamed Buffy. "I love him and he loves me!" "You are being childish . You don't even know what love is. You're too young to know." "Why is everyone telling me that today? How do you know what I feel? You make me sick! Get out of my way. I'm going to my room." Buffy roughly pushed past her mother and entered her room, slamming the door behind her. She could hear her mother scream from behind the door. "You are SO grounded young lady. You are to come home straight from school every day for a week. And no phone! No going out with your friends, and no Bronze!" Buffy threw a pillow as hard as she could against the wall, sending feathers flying. It just wasn't fair. She flung herself down on the bed, grown-ups don't understand anything. She hugged her stuffed teddy bear to her chest and wallowed for a while in self-pity. She had to spend all her time fighting the most horrible things the world could offer, then she had to go to school, try to act like a normal kid. It wan't fair. "Nobody understands me," she pouted. She almost let out a hysterical giggle thinking that if her mom got this mad because she thought that Angel waas a couple years older, just imagine what she would do if she found out Angel was a vampire. The giggle died on her lips and she began to sob. She hated fighting with her mom. Everyday it was a temptation to tell her mom all about being a slayer. She wanted to trust her mom with all her secrets. But that wouldn't be fair either. She knew her mom couldn't handle it, so she protected her as much as she could. Holding it all inside, rather than hurt her mom. It was just so hard. Buffy lay on her bed, and finally fell into exhausted sleep on her tear-dampened pillow. ***************** After Angel dropped Buffy off at her house, he trudged home. He knew that they had to talk about his vampire side. But it would be so easy to just try to ignore it. Of course he could never really forget it. Every second of every night it tormented him. But he would rather she not think about it. He would rather she could just pretend that she was dating a normal human. He shook his head angrily. That was no good either. They had to talk about it. She had to understand the danger that always prickled right beneath his skin. But it had hurt to tell her those things tonight, to let her see the bloodlust. He had been so afraid when she mentioned lusting after her blood. So afraid that his answer would disgust her. But she hadn't turned away. He had seen the spark of doubt in her eyes, but she had swallowed it. She would stick with him through anything, he could see it in her eyes. Just knowing that she loved him sent him spinning. That she could accept him, care about him. It was unbelievable. It was amazing. It was what made his life worth living. Angel reached his apartment and unlocked the door. Dawn was coming soon. Time to sleep. Not that he had a coffin or anything to get into. In fact he didn't even have to sleep during the day. Vampires didn't need much sleep at all actually. But sleeping was a great way to kill the boredom of being stuck inside all day. Reading was good too, but sleeping was best. The hours simply melted away when you slept. He slipped inside his aptment and froze. There was someone here. At least one vampire, maybe more. He could sense them. It had been awhile since any vamps had attacked him in his home. Actually since Darla, no one had entered the apartment. He wracked his brain. Darla was dead, so who could it be? Angel felt his face transform as his anger rose. A deep growl rumbled from his throat. "You know what I hate?" he asked loudly. "When monsters invade my personal space; I REALLY hate that." Two vampires drifted from the shadows in answer to his voice. "Only two?" he asked. Keeping his back to the wall and a nonchalant grin on his face, Angel prepared himself for a fight. "We did not come to kill you Angelus." said one of the vampires, a tall man with jet black hair curling down around his shoulders. He was muscular, not muscle-bound but powerful looking. "This time," hissed the other vampire, moving in closer to Angel. The vampire was smaller, light brown hair cut short in a pixie cut. But the look in her eyes was anything but enchanting. Angel swallowed a gasp as he stared into eyes that were pure evil. She ran her hand down his cheek and he shuddered, pulling away from her. "The Annointed One wants us to give you a message," she said. "What, my answering machine wasn't working?" Angel asked flippantly. His mind worked feverishly. He thought he could take the big guy, and normally the woman would have been a breeze. But her touch had scared him. It made his skin crawl with fear. She wasn't very impressive looking, but he could feel the power rolling off her. She could have rivaled the Master. He looked into her eyes, they were completely empty of emotion. Dead eyes. "Why are you taking orders from anyone?" he asked. She hissed at him. It seemed to be a sore point. "I'll take orders for now. But things may change in the future." She stared at the tall man. "Give him the message" she ordered. The tall man grabbed Angel's hair before he had a chance to react and banged his head against the wall. Stars exploded in Angel's vision but he had the prescence of mind to kick out with one leg while he jabbed the man as hard as he could in the throat. The man gasped, loosening his grip on Angel's hair. Angel's vision had begun to clear but he knew he would have a nasty headache all day. He was beginning to get severely pissed. He threw the man against the wall and was about to do the same to the smaller woman. Before he could throw her, she raised her hands and he felt himself frozen. "Enough!" she screamed. "Put me down." Angel obeyed. He had no choice, he had lost control of her body. "Forgive Daniel," she said nodding towards the man who was picking himself up off the floor. "This was not supposed to happen. I will give you the message and we will leave you in peace. The Annointed One says that your relationship with the Slayer is an abomination. You are forbidden to continue this relationship and in penance for this sin you must bring her dead body to the Annointed One within three days. If you fail, every vampire in this city will hunt you down until you have been annihalated." With that the two vampires slipped away into the sewer system that ran beneath the apartment. Angel stared at the wall for a moment. Just what he needed, threats from his fellow vampires, ultimatums. This was just great, as if being in a relationship wasn't bad enough. continues ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 19 Aug 1997 22:55:11 -0400 (EDT) From: LadyRHood@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (5/10) DISCLAIMER:I don't own any of the characters from the buffyverse. Sometimes I steal them like I am doing now but I always return them as good as new. And I never make any money off them. (That would make me a pimp if I did wouldn't it?) They belong to the nice people at Fox, the WB and of course to Joss Wheadon. Lily is mine, mine I tell you!! Also thanks to my fabulous beta reader: Dare the Great :) Part 5 ########### Buffy shivered as she walked next to Angel on her way home. This was really creeping her out. The fact that this vampire was a former Slayer changed everything. She had know it was possible, she had even had nightmares about it. But this made it all too real. She could feel herself starting to pity the vampire, and she quickly banished the thought. Giles had said her name was Lily. It was a pretty name. No! She stopped herself. She's not a Slayer anymore, she's one of the monsters. Buffy was scared. How could she possibly defeat something that had double her power? If Lily had been a Slayer gone bad, then the fight would've been equal. But she had the power of a Slayer and a Master vampire combined. Buffy held tightly to Angel's hand, glad he was here with her. But the sense of safety that she had felt just a few hours before was gone. Her confidence was gone with it. A normal vamp she knew she could handle. But she had feeling Lily would kick her ass from here to L.A. Their only hope was that Giles could find some way out of this, some slight edge, anything at all. "Angel?" she said quietly. "What are we going to do?" He thought for a moment about lying, saying he had a plan, or telling her that it would all be ok. But it was too late for lies, there was too much at stake. "I don't know," he finally answered. "I don't understand why this is happening now. If Colin wants me dead, why do you have to be the one to kill me?" "I didn't tell you this before," Angel said. "I wanted to protect you. The other vampires say it's an abomintion, me being with you. I have to kill you as a penance." He looked down at the sidewalk as it passed beneath their slowly moving feet. "It's my fault." Buffy's heartbroken comment made Angel stare at her in shock. "No it's not. How could it be your fault?" "If we weren't dating then they wouldn't be trying to kill you." Angel laughed. "I kill them, so they try to kill me. I think you are just a convenient excuse. Or one last effort to draw me back into that world." He glared into the night. "I would rather die than go back." They turned the corner onto Buffy's street. "You have to stay back," said Buffy. "Just in case. I mean I'll get in trouble if my mom sees me 'cause I'm grounded but if she sees me with you then we're talking ax murder." She kissed Angel lightly on the lips and turned to go, but he grabbed her arm stopping her retreat. "If Giles doesn't find anything to help us.." he started. Buffy raised a hand to his mouth to silence him but he removed it gently. "I won't let them kill you, they'll take me first." "And I won't let them take you. We die together, if we die at all. Like Romeo and Juliet." "Death isn't romantic Buffy. I don't want you to give up your life for me. I may not be a full vampire anymore, but I still have the monster in me. I've done so many evil deeds. I deserve to die." He reached out a finger and entwined a lock of hair on it. "You don't." "Don't talk like that. At least wait until we know if Giles finds something." Buffy covered his finger with her hand. "Please don't give up yet. I'd much rather have you alive than throwing your life away." "Good-night." "Promise me something." "What?" "Promise you won't decide to do it alone. Whatever happens, we'll go through it together." The night was suddenly filled with silence as Angel thought about what she was asking. It meant he couldn't keep her safe, away from all the dangers. It meant he couldn't run off into the night to give his life alone. But being her protector was an illusion anyway, they were almost equal in power. And much as he knew he deserved death, he no longer craved it. She had given him reason to live. "I promise." She flashed him one of her beautiful smiles and dashed home. He watched her go with a heavy heart. If she was killed because of him, he would stake himself. If she died his life was over. He didn't have a clue about how to get out of this mess, but for her he would try anything, he would come up with something. Because the alternative was unthinkable. ****** Buffy staggered into the library. She felt like she had been beaten with a very large stick. She had fallen asleep in math, and in science. Just enough sleep to make her body crave more. Just enough so that she felt every nerve screaming for rest. She slumped at one of the tables and put her head down on her arms. Within a few seconds she had drifted off again. Giles emerged from his office, looking about as awful as he felt. He ran his hand through already rumpled hair. He had spent the entire night looking for something, anything that could give them an edge. All he had to show for it was a pounding headache and a weariness that felt imbedded in his bones. He saw Buffy sleeping in her seat and decided not to wake her until he had something good to tell her. The doors to the library burst open to reveal Xander and Willow talking and laughing as they entered the dim room. They immediately lowered their voices when they saw Buffy's exhausted state. "Another late night?" Willow asked Giles. He nodded distantly. "A little more than that. We have a serious problem." "What is it this time? Werewolves? Mummies? I don't think we've had any of those yet." said Xander. Giles' serious expression didn't change and a touch of worry began to worm it's way through Xander's mind. "I wish it were just that." As Giles explained the situation, Xander and Willow could feel fear creeping up their spines. "So what you're saying is that this thing has more than double Buffy's power?" asked Willow. "Buffy is the strongest Slayer I have ever heard of, but this Lily creature is at least twice as strong, yes." Willow shook her head in confusion. "Why would she obey the Annointed One? He can't possibly have that kind of power. If he did he would have killed the Master and taken over," she asked. "Not necessarily." Giles contradicted. "He may have decided to let Buffy do the dirty work for him. However, I think that the key to this puzzle lies in exactly the question you've raised. If we can figure out why Lily is following Colin we may be able to do something to break the alliance." "C'mon Willow," said Xander. "I feel the urge to do some reading." He tossed her a book and grabbed one for himself. He threw himself into the research willingly for once. Guilt was tearing him apart for what he had said to Buffy the other day. He had hurt her, he had deliberately hurt her. He had let petty jealousy get the better of him, and if he could make it up to her in any way he would've done it. He didn't know how to stop loving her, but for the sake of their friendship he would try. He would step aside and let her have her happiness. She loved Angel. He could see that. Nothing he did would change that. He sighed dragging his attention to the book in his hands. Here he was, actually fighting to save his rival. Here he was, actually *reading.* Willow watched Xander out of the corner of her eyes as he slowly flipped the page. From the set of his jaw she had the feeling that he was thinking. Probably about Buffy. She watched him as he chewed on his lip in concentration. Deep longing filled her being and she wished with all her heart that she could just shout out his name. That he would turn and see her love for him. That she could declare it to his face, that she could look into his eyes and see love for her echo out of them. She brought herself back to the task at hand. Carefully looking for any reference to Lily. This wasn't the time to indulge her fantasies, Buffy needed them. Buffy woke to see her friends skimming over page after page with their eyes. She felt a wash of affection roll over her. Her buds. Her glance faltered when it fell on Xander. She hoped he wasn't still mad. She had said some pretty bad things. He had deserved it, but she felt a little guilty because she knew that it was jealousy that led him to be hurtful. Jealousy that was her fault. Xander looked up from his book to see Buffy staring at him. "Hey look who's up," he retorted. "Maybe now you'll stop slacking, and give us a hand here." Buffy almost sighed with relief, this sounded like normal Xander. "Wow, Xander, reading. Is that voluntary, or have you been threatened into it?" "No threats. I've been meaning to read," he turned the book over to look at the title," _The Blood Rituals_. It's a real heart stopper." He grinned at Buffy. He seemed to have been forgiven. Buffy grinned back. Maybe they would talk about the fight later, but for now things were back to normal. She grabbed a book and sat down to read. continues ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 19 Aug 1997 22:56:06 -0400 (EDT) From: LadyRHood@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: Nights Like These (7/10) DISCLAIMER:I don't own any of the characters from the buffyverse. Sometimes I steal them like I am doing now but I always return them as good as new. And I never make any money off them. (That would make me a pimp if I did wouldn't it?) They belong to the nice people at Fox, the WB and of course to Joss Wheadon. Lily is mine, mine I tell you!! Part 7 ####### "So Giles, what's this great idea you have?" asked Buffy as they settled into chairs at Giles' house. Giles stared at the four different pairs of eyes that were turned trustingly to him for help. Buffy and Angel sat together on the couch, holding hands. Again. They seemed to be physically unable to separate themselves, he thought uncharitably. Willow sitting in one of the overstuffed armchairs was joined by Xander who had hurled several cushions on the floor near her feet, and then flung himself down on top of them. He wished he had more to give them, a plan that would give them confidence. What he did have was risky at best. "W..well," he stammered to a start. "Within the vampire community there are several very sacred rituals. They're like laws, only if one of them breaks a law they are hunted, burned alive and then their ashes are scattered to the winds." "In other words: you break the law, you get fried." said Xander. "To put it plainly. But that's not what I'm getting at. My point is that one of these rituals is the right to challenge a fellow vampire to a duel." Angel nodded at Giles' explaination. "That's true," said Angel. "The custom isn't used much anymore. But it is still valid. No vampire can lawfully resist a challenge." "So you're saying that I should challenge Lily to hand to hand combat?" asked Buffy. "Actually, no." answered Giles. "What are you talking about? I'm the Slayer remember. I slay the vampires." said Buffy. "Is this ringing any bells Giles?" "Buffy, you can't fight Lily. You aren't strong enough." said Giles placatingly. "Gee, thanks Mr. I'm a big help to your self-esteem,"answered Buffy. "Well if Buffy's not going to do it, who is?" asked Willow. "Yeah, I mean I've been working out..but I don't think any of us are as powerful as she is" quipped Xander. "You've been working out?" asked Willow. "I thought you were looking a lot more buff." "Really? I wasn't sure it was helping that much," Xander trailed off under Giles' reproving stare. "Ok, we'll talk about my muscles later." "If we could focus what's important right now," chided Giles."I was actually thinking that Angel would challenge her." Buffy's eyes widened in surprise. "Angel?" she asked. "Giles, you've been inhaling too much newsprint. Angel isn't any more powerful than I am." "I'm willing to try," said Angel. The announcement had caught him by surprise as well, but he would much rather fight Lily himself than watch Buffy get slaughtered. "That's a noble gesture, but there is more to my plan," said Giles exasperated by all the interruptions. "If everybody would just shut up for three bloody minutes until I could finish telling you the WHOLE plan, then maybe you would understand." The teenagers snapped their mouths closed and put their questions on hold. "Thank you, as I was trying to say...you're right Buffy, right now Angel is only as powerful as you are. However, he can become more powerful. Whereas you can't." "I don't understand," said Buffy. She glanced at Angel, who was beginning to get a sneaking suspicion of what Giles was driving at. "If he drinks of your blood Buffy, his power will increase until it is almost equal with Lily. It will only be a temporary increase in power, but because it is Slayer blood it may be enough to give Angel the edge he will need to beat her." explained Giles. Angel shook his head as Giles' words confirmed his suspicions. He rose from the couch and turned his back to the room. "No, I can't do it," he said with only a slight tremor in his voice. "I'll fight her on my own." "But you'll die, and Buffy will be next." argued Giles. "This is our only chance." "You don't understand, there is a reason that I haven't fed on a live human in almost a century. It goes beyond guilt. I have no idea if I'll be able to control myself once I get a taste of warm blood." "I think I see the problem," said Giles thoughtfully. "Do you?" asked Angel, as he turned to face the group. "I don't trust myself to do this. I would rather fight and die, then take the chance that I might kill Buffy because I couldn't control myself." His voice began to rise as he continued to talk. "None of you know what it's like to feel the blood lust, none of you know how hard I have to fight to keep the demon in check, pray God none of you ever know." "Angel," whispered Buffy as she joined him standing in front of the group. She reached to touch his face but he shyed away. "My sweet Angelus." She reached out again and lightly touched his chest. "You're right, none of us know what it's like. None of us have any idea. But none of that matters to me. You may not trust yourself but I do. I trust you with my life, my heart, my soul." Her arm slid around his body and he tensed at her touch, relaxing only a little as she continued to speak. "You are my Angel, and I will not lose you becuase we were too afraid to try. You think I'm not afraid too? Well I am, I am more scared than I have ever been in my life. But I can stand fear, I cannot stand by and watch you go into a battle that you can't win by yourself. You need my blood. I understand the risks and I am willing to take them. You have to do the same. This is our only chance." She rested her head gently on his chest, holding him in her arms, wishing with all her heart that she could take him away from all this. Wishing that she could take some of his pain into herself. "It's too much to ask," he whispered. "If I lose control once, I may never regain control again." "I know, but I ask it anyway. For us." she whispered back. He nodded silently, grimly. "I'll do it." He wrapped Buffy in his arms, hanging onto her body like a life-line, as if she was the last thing in the world. As if only she could keep him sane. God he hoped she was enough. Xander glanced up at Willow, then at Giles. His eyes traveled the room, resting on anything but the pair of them in each other's arms. It wasn't just the jealousy either, really it wasn't! He felt like he was intruding on them, or spying on their most intimate moment. Willow's uncomfortable expression proved that she felt the same way. They didn't belong here. This was private, and there was nothing they could do to help plan at the moment. They looked at each other, and as one they crept over to Giles. Tomorrow was Saturday, the moment of truth was tomorrow night. They would be there as Buffy and Angel prepared. Even if they couldn't help, they wanted to show their support. Besides, if Angel did go out of control..there was no way Giles could stop him by himself. He would probably faint, if Angel touched him with a feather. Neither of them wanted to think about that much. If Angel did lose control, there really wasn't much any of them could do about it. But they would be there none the less. Buffy heard them say their good-byes and go as if she was in a haze. All she wanted right now was to stay right here in Angel's arms. To never let go, to never see the sun rise and then set on them. She could feel his fear, though he controlled it well. He was right, it was too much to ask. But there was too much at stake not to ask. If they lost, they would lose each other. Buffy refused to let that happen. If it meant being a blood donor, well that was what it meant. Angel sighed softly, loving the feel of her body in his hands. The heat of her arms as they encircled his waist. He would rather die, than risk killing her. But he had agreed. He had agreed to feed on a living human. Even as he dreaded the moment, he could feel anticipation well inside him. It had been more than 80 years. He fought the hunger as it rose. Tomorrow, he would face the ultimate test. He would face his biggest fear. And he wasn't at all sure that he would win. They decided it would be safer for Angel to walk Buffy home so they told Giles they were leaving and began to stroll the streets of Sunnydale, heading towards Buffy's house. "I meant to tell you earlier that you're re-invited into my house," said Buffy. "It just sort of slipped my mind." Angel's lips stretched into a smile. "Buffy," he said soberly. "I'm very scared." "I think we all are," she answered. "I don't think any of you are as scared as I am." "Probably not, you win the prize for having the most to worry about." "Thanks," he said wryly as another grin threatened to break his grim facade. "I think I saw a quarter smile," said Buffy triumphantly. "Besides, you know if this doesn't work Lily will kill us, so it's not you that I'm worried is going to go homicidal." She stopped walking and looked him directly in the eye. "I know you're going out of your skull with worry, I am too. I know you don't feel like laughing. I don't much either. But it's either laugh, cry or go insane so for now I'll laugh." "You are so amazing," said Angel leaning closer to her face. Buffy stood on her toes to help him reach her lips. "Oh SHIT!" she suddenly exclaimed. "What?" "Ohmigod, Ohmigod." Buffy said, beginning to hyperventilate. "I totally forgot that I'm grounded and I was supposed to go home right after school. My mom is going to be beyond pissed, I'm probably grounded for three lifetimes. I really have to go." Her words ran together in her panic, and she turned to run to her house. Then she turned back, gave Angel a hard kiss on the lips. He watched as she ran down the street with a bemused expression on his face. "She is the strangest girl." continues ------------------------------ End of buffyfic Digest V1 #14 ***************************** To subscribe to buffyfic Digest, send the command: subscribe buffyfic-digest in the body of a message to "majordomo@xmission.com". 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